Bad Advice for Good People

First off, don’t be so sure daddy knows you’re a lesbian. Lots of people watch The L Word and believe me, they aren’t all bumping uglies. It’s possible he thinks mom’s getting her open mindedness on, I mean it is her computer he’s spying on. But regardless, it sounds like the subject is a closed one with him, no direct confrontations. He hasn’t asked, and you haven’t told.

You’re 16, you’ve got about 2 more years in your safe little home till you head out to that vast open vagina we call college (yes, you’re going to college, or at least leaving home. No, it’s not an option, you’re doing it! Because I say so, that’s why). In the meantime, there’s no reason in the world to put yourself in danger. Your family is homophobic, you said so yourself, so coming out could mean a huge interruption in your life. Your nice warm nest could disintegrate into screaming matches and marches to church or the shrink, you might even end up on the street for no good reason besides their intolerance. Why risk it? If no one is shining a light on your sexuality, they’re probably just as happy to leave it in the dark. They might even have a clue but would prefer to leave it as a foggy notion. Don’t confront them with it now.

Study hard, join activities, kick ass in school, have your girl crushes and fondle sessions and when the time comes, go very far away to college where, if you’re parents are paying for it, you will continue to stay closeted to them till such time as you’re supporting yourself.

But, the very moment you’re financially free and feeling some independence, come out, come out wherever you are! I’m not an advocate of closets, not in any way. I just think a young woman like yourself shouldn’t be deprived of her parents’ promised love and support because they are still stuck in the 20th century.

B.A.G.